Imagine a commonplace scenario where you are trying to feed your baby but it keeps wailing continuously. Another one comes to mind, where you are trying to dress your kids for school but one of them keeps throwing tantrums when it comes to finishing his/her breakfast in time. You tend to shout at your kid out of sheer anger and frustration.
Mommy rage or Mom rage is a term used to describe the uncontrollable bouts of anger experienced by women during pregnancy, postpartum and beyond, often due to reasons beyond their control. Mothers are so often the victim of this rage since their bodies and circumstances both undergo massive changes as they bring a new life into this world and help it grow and nurture into a fine and able being. What is required is a sense of acknowledging this anger and resentment and figuring out the underlying reasons that cause it.
Being a mother comes with its own set of challenges and expectations from everyone around. You can try and put in your best effort but there still might be a few glitches here and there and you’re bound to feel the urge to let it all out, sometimes on your child too. But you shouldn’t feel guilty over it and instead use the below mentioned causes to identify your triggers and try and work on them:
- Not prioritising your needs such as adequate sleep and nutrition which is essential to bodily functions is one way in which mothers cause themselves a lot of stress. To put it effectively, you can only function efficiently only when you have adequate energy.
- Overburdening yourself with responsibilities affects mental health greatly, often making you believe that you’re not good enough. Remember: Everyone can ask for help.
- Having a complete disregard for your emotional well-being and not talking about it with the people who care about you.
- Being overly competitive regarding the growth and development of your child. More often than not, the natural course is generally the best option.
- Forgetting to tune out of social media can take a toll on you. Learn to use social media for what it is and not as a means to compare your lows with someone else’s biggest victories in motherhood.
- Not recognising that you’re grieving. Give yourself the much needed downtime and space to recuperate from the ordeal of doing so much hard work.
While on some days you can identify these deep-set patterns and defeat that urge to lash out on your child, some days it is inevitably going to be difficult to do so. What is needed is to identify these triggers. While you’re at it, overcome that emotion of guilt of not doing just enough for your child and be rest assured that you are, in fact, doing what you can in the best possible manner.